overrrr...

it is over.
like done.
finished.

but why am i so upset about it...
i wanted it..
but now do i still?

i am a terrible person.. PERIOD.

i just feel empty...
goshh..
why did i let all this happen?
is it just the idea or is it you...
i can't decide..

i can't do this to you.
it just isn't fair..
maybe i should just end the chapter here... and not look back..
but i don't want to end it..
or do i?

it feels like i am not even in control of my life..
i see things happening one way but i am screaming inside trying to stop it..
but no matter how loud i scream no one hears me..
and nothing changes...

it feels like whatever the right thing to do...
the person "controlling" does just the opposite..
why is that?

are "you" trying to ruin everything?

i am sorry...

this isn't good..

nothing.
really that is how i feel.
like nothing at all..
my head is empty..
i am loosing it..
everything...
why?
who knows...
i hate it.
fuck.
please get me out of here.
take me back to when i was six
and everything seemed so carefree.
who ever said growing up was a good thing must have been out of their mind
i want to go back when..
all i did was play.
gosh how i wish life was still so simple..
can i just please get a taste of it again?

who? what? where? why? how? when?

who am i?
does anyone even know the "real me"
do i even know?
i personally don't think i do..
i am 15 different people...
it just varies on the day..
i never used to be like this
why all of a sudden do i?
i don't like this feeling...
i want the "old" me back?
but where can i find myself?
i don't know.....
i wish i could answer that question!
it doesn't even feel like i am the same person at all...
i don't like the same things or people...

life?

o.

when people say stupid pointless things all i wanna say is

O


especially in school when some one
says something to the whole class
about there pointless stories.
like really seriously

SHUT YOU'RE MOUTH!!
YOU ARE SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO ANNOYING.
NO ONE CARES!!

school....

i am sooooo sick of school...
i have totally lost my interest...
like completely..
i am not even trying that much anymore...
i am just doing half ass on all my stuff.
i know it isn't a good attitude... but that just how it is..
sorry?
well this is a dumb blog..
oh yah and i have lost my interest in writing blogs too...
alkafhhjasdf!

dear..

whoever reads this...
i just have to say that.....................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................
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this blog doesn't have a point to it.
pretty much to sum up what i am feeling right now is..
CONFUSION.
you wanna know why?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
well you can't.
endofstory!

blog?

nothing nothing nothing.
that is it?
weird moods?
why?
no one knows..
does this blog have a point,..

not really, but sure..........

well
aslfjksdkfhkj :)
peace!